Finding Joy During the Holiday Season
It’s beginning to look a lot like stress-mas.
Is it self-inflicted, or the societal pressures that send most of us moms into a panic about the approaching holiday season? The guilt we feel if we don’t have the best tree, the brightest lights, and the biggest present pile is REAL. As though these are the markings of a good mom.
I once had a woman tell me that it wasn’t until she became a mom herself that she finally understood why her own mom always cried at Christmas.
Do our children really remember the “stuff”? Or is having a mom that was present and able to have a laugh during the holiday season what makes a lasting impact?
The pressure to provide the “perfect” gift, or of having enough resources to make your child’s holiday dreams come true, can be exhausting. We spend all this time and money making sure we get the perfect “thing”, only to watch our child find hours of enjoyment playing with the cardboard box it came in.
Rather than place undue pressure on ourselves and others, we need to shift our thinking to one of understanding and kindness. Understanding that the holidays are more than finding the “perfect” gift or decorating to Hallmark movie standards, and kindness for ourselves as we do the best we can.
Unfortunately, saying “the things in life that matter aren’t things” is a lot harder when that sentiment is constantly overshadowed by messages telling us that to be happy and have the perfect Christmas, children need things. This manipulative messaging is meant to make you feel like an inadequate parent in the hopes that you will buy; buy newer, buy shinier, and buy more.
The truth is that you are enough, and your children will not love you any less because you didn’t get them the trendiest toy or turn your house into a Winter Wonderland.
This holiday season, we invite you to make a list of low cost/no cost things to do together, such as:
Stay in your pjs all day and play board games
Build a fort out of blankets
Go to the library and check out some books on holiday crafts and spend some time making homemade decorations
Bake cookies
Throw down a blanket and have a picnic in the living room
Go for a walk in your neighbourhood to see Christmas lights on all the houses
Next time you are cuddling up to watch movies about how the holidays should look, remind yourself that this is not real; life is messy, and the holidays don’t always live up to our expectations.
Our children are only children for such a short period, and that precious time we do have together is better spent enjoying one another’s company. Truly, the best gifts we can give them are ones without a price tag: our attention, presence, and love.
Want to learn how we are supporting moms through the holiday season and beyond? Check out our Christmas Campaign here.
Written by Kim Gale-Gotowiec